35

Today I'm 35.  35 feels like a marker, more so than 31 through 34 did.  I still felt like a baby when I reached 30.  It didn't phase the part of my brain that analyzes age and maturity and all the things that go hand in hand.  35 feels significant.  Not just because my thighs are evolving into a different life form.  Life in general is more significant for the 35 year old me than it was for my 34 year old self.  I'm starting to feel a bit more present in myself as a friend, a mom, a wife, a Christian, a professional, a servant, a consumer and an individual.  More intentional maybe?  I have a relationship with myself these days and that's starting to change the way I see the world.

Gretchen Rubin's "The Happiness Project" is my current book of choice.  Each morning (the three I designate for working), I sit in my white, paint chipped rocking chair in the corner of my baby blue office and read.  Actual books.  With a highlighter in my right hand.  Gretchen grabbed me immediately.  She was "happy" in a blessed life that included a dreamy hubbie, two healthy kids, a fulfilling career, a fun city to exist in, healthy relationships etc.  But she questioned the quality of her "happy."  Was she living each day truly smiling at all she had surrounding her?  Was she grateful and sharing herself with the world?  Was she too negative and critical?  That resonated with me.  She says,

"One of my goals for the happiness project was to prepare for adversity - to develop the self-discipline and the mental habits to deal with a bad thing when it happened.  The time to start exercising, stop nagging and organize our digital photos was when everything was going smoothly.  I didn't want to wait for a crisis to remake my life."

Isn't that the truth?  I'm at a point in life where God has handed me a slew of gifts, on a shiny silver platter. Do I know what to do with them?  Do I know how to be responsible with the gold in front of me?  My kids, my marriage, my relationships, my money, my time, my freedom, my voice?  Because I do realize that the gold might disappear or change with one phone call or one doctor visit.  All the gems life holds right now could evaporate tomorrow, so it's time to determine how I deal with the gems so I'll be able to tackle the dirt and grime life will inevitably bring.

My 35 is a transitional year for our family.  We're changing and evolving and learning, according to what we need as a unit of 4.  My new career path has kicked all this off, given the time I have to process our priorities and challenges.  Of course this looks different for every family, but through the past year's events and discoveries, life has taught us a few valuable lessons.  As a result, we're attempting lifestyle changes....not to say we'll succeed at them all, but we're giving it an honest go.

Goals (some lofty some not so much):
Eating healthier and with purpose (future blog post on this subject to come).
Spending less on things that mean less in the grander scheme. Spending more on experiences that mean something.
Praying and talking to God like he's a little troll that resides on our shoulder, because he does.
Instilling values of acting with a servant heart on a daily basis - both to our kids and ourselves.
Sitting on the floor with our kids and ignoring the mess.
Donating toys and "stuff" we don't use or need.
Getting rid of the glue that attaches our hands to our phones.
Reading and turning off the tube at night.
Talking - a lot.
Reading chapter books to Dude.  Dedicating the time he needs for daily OT exercises. Experimenting with natural supplements and things from God's earth in order to help him be the best Dude he can be.
Deeper breathing and less yelling.
Smiling at people.
Smiling at each other as a family and laughing like we mean it.

That's a list.  I know it.  But something tells me that if we can start pulling this stuff off, that whole "happiness" aspect that Gretchen talks about will fall right into place.  That's 35 for this Mama.  Life is new, life is good and I plan on monopolizing on that.  Or rather, learning how to monopolize on that.  Slowly, mind you.  With a whole lot of room for error.