Bedtime Round Here

Below is an example of an average bedtime around these parts....

Dude gets in PJs (ever so slowly), he comes down for a treat (3 skittles or something along those lines) and heads up to brush his teeth and go potty.  We practice spitting as this is still a concept he isn't grasping.  We're getting there though. 

We head to his gigantic bed, where we read books.  Tonight we learned the first 3 Commandments and wrote them on his board to help him remember.  No, he can't read, but there's something about writing them down that makes us parentals feel teacher like.

We cuddle for about 30 seconds before he starts kicking me in the face and playing with my nostrils and proceed to say prayers.  Tonight's prayers ended with "And I'm grateful for water to drink.  And God, Mommy is grateful for wine.  Amen." 

I go to leave his room after kisses, butterfly kisses and saying "Good night, sleep tight, don't let the bedbugs bite.  You too and me too."  Before I shut the door he says, "Wait, Mom!  Look at me."  His one arm is straight up in the air and the other one by his side.  "I am da Statue of Liberty!"  Wow buddy.  That is awesome.  I go to close the door again.

"Wait, Mom!  I have to go potty."  I inform him that he JUST went like a racehorse and he does not need to go again.  He insists that he does and I threaten to take his puppy away if he doesn't get any pee out.  I stand in the bathroom door like a Nazi, waiting for the pee.  He's standing up, looking at me, and says "You just have to be patient Mom."  5 seconds later he pushes out 10 drops of pee and says, "See Mom.  I told you.  Da pee came." 

He puts his PJs back on and heads back to bed, muttering something about monsters being in his bed.  I choose to ignore these further excuses to NOT going to bed and tell him if he comes out again, puppy is going to have to sleep in the closet.  I shut the door and tell him that I love him.  Thus far, that concludes bed time for tonight.