My New Normal

My career as a PR and Marketing professional concluded on December 19 at 12:30pm.  I was sent off with more love and admiration than I expected, which was touching on so many levels.  My food bank family was a steadfast part of my everyday for 7 years.  For that, I'll always be grateful.  This week Tuesday marked the beginning of my new normal - I should probably say the beginning of trying to decipher what my "new normal" will look like.  And feel like.  And sound like.  And taste like (I bought a crap load of new coffee flavors to start my day with).  Dude went back to school and Squirt will continue to go to day care 3 days per week.  And I'll dive in to this new routine of writing.  One baby step at a time. Like, teeny tiny baby steps.  My wise and uberly supportive confidants keep hammering those words into my overachieving, "get it done" brain.  What I hear them saying is......Take.  Your.  Time.  Breathe and let this life manifest in the way it's meant to.  Go easy on yourself and don't expect to move mountains on day 1.  Or even on day 60.  Or day 365 for that matter.  This isn't a small task for me.  I'm a doer and an organizer of anything that might possibly need one morsel of organizing.  This new normal is flowy and unpredictable.  I'm slowly learning to appreciate that and breathe through my days.   

A significant piece of starting this new routine was creating a space where my creative juices can explode. The basement desk, which looked like something you'd find in a cubicle in Office Space, wasn't going to aid in my creative process.  SO.....we did this.  We turned our guest bedroom upstairs into Mama's Haven.  The bedroom has been relocated to the basement, which is proving to be quite nice.  Especially since it'll put guests out of the midst of our intimate family biz.     

I spent a day painting the tan walls a baby baby blue.  Calming blue.  THEN I found my masterpiece.  This chest of drawers came from a farm in Nebraska where it was used to store farm tools.  One of the drawers is still labeled just that.  I knew I had to have it when I peered through the window at a local antique store. And I found a way to bring it home.  I'm rather crafty when it comes to using my Dutch money skills.  The rocking chair was a Craigslist special - $20.

We sold the stiff desk and I found another antique piece that was born in the Midwest. I heart the scratches and dents all over him.  Hes been used and used well.  

 This chair is going to be seeing a lot of my bootie.  A whole lot.  

 My sweet son anointed my new space with the pet rock he crafted in Kindergarten.  He keeps me company.  The middle rock was given as a gift from a foundation I volunteer with.  It reads, "What in the world are you doing for heaven's sake?"  And the shiny heart is a precious gem from my old co-worker, Kaye.  It's also my phone screensaver.  These items bring smile and inspiration.

That's my Haven.  I love this space and I love that it's mine.  The kids treat it as such, which also makes my heart happy.  No legos or plastic fruit inside these walls.  The work that will come from my Haven?  The words are knocking at my teeth trying to get out, but I'm keeping a clenched jaw until I'm ready to verbally vomit. This week I started working on my writer's website, domain, email and organizing my thoughts around how to proceed.  It's forming.  I can feel it.  If you ask me what I do with my days, my answer will be simple.  I'm writing.  I'm creating.  I'm forming connections.  I'm unfolding.  Slowly but definitely surely.

Can I take a moment to tell you the depth of gratitude I feel toward my other half?  My Tim has supported me through this dreamy existence since day 1 and is a pillar of encouragement and calm. Thank you love. THIS is what it looks like to support your best friend in following their dreams.  I can hardly wait to do the same for you down the road.